Let’s skip over childhood and the most extreme scenarios, as they are both different conversations. Let’s consider that you are an adult living a non-extreme life. We want to see the “general” aspect for our purposes.

If you’ve ever thought about what “We teach people how to treat each other” means, you may have believed that it relates only to what you allow, that you stand up for yourself and/or allow only what is appropriate for you, or you don’t do it, or do it in a limited way. And, that is a valid definition. It is also the external focus; and there are a variety of ways to improve this, if necessary.

But, you are more than just a physical being. Much of what you experience in your outer life is, in fact, the result of what happens in your inner life. (There’s a school of thought that says that everything you experience on the outer level is a direct result of the inner, but that’s another conversation, too.)

Let’s say you feel that someone (or more than one person) does not treat you as if you have value. Let’s check your value well: how well do you value yourself?

If you are a service provider, do you undervalue what you offer for this?

If you fully embraced your innate value, how could the way you experience your life be different? How would you feel or respond if someone told you that they value you less than you value yourself?

Does someone not respect your limits? Do you honor your limits? When you do, what is different about what you allow yourself to participate in or how others engage with you?

When someone treats you in a way that you don’t appreciate, you have the right to respond appropriately. Then take a moment to consider if they acted as a mirror for you… and resolve to respond appropriately on an inner level. Whatever others “do” to us, we tend to do to ourselves to a greater extent.

I’m not saying that others will change their personalities if you use this process to create inner changes, nor is that your concern; but you will experience yourself, them and your life differently, from a more self-empowered place if you do. You will be able to respond in your best interest instead of feeling controlled by what seem like random external experiences.

Let go of any self-belief influenced by your past. The past is just a memory in the present moment. You are here, therefore you have value. If you have estimated your worth based on what others have said about you or said and done to you, and this comes back negative, now seems like a good time to see this for what it is and start changing it.

You are so much more than you ever imagined. Give yourself permission to live it, starting with yourself.