Do not buy Wink Frozen Dessert without reading this review. This vegan, fat-free and sugar-free diet food has two enthusiastic thumbs and eight fingers down.

Unfortunately Wink Frozen Dessert is classified as a food. I had a pint of their dark chocolate last night. When I looked at the ingredient list, the only two substances that were recognized as “food” were cocoa powder and ground flaxseed. Other ingredients include inulin, pea protein, guar gum, stevia and monk fruit extracts, and a substance called “natural flavors.” Note that “natural flavors” is a general phrase for minor ingredients that the food manufacturer does not have to disclose or list. Often “natural flavors” include neotame, a potent excitotoxin from the same family of artificial sweeteners as aspartame. Neotame would definitely be needed to make the Wink product palatable because the stevia and monk extracts are not as sweet.

Taste wise this might just be the Wink Frozen Dessert, it might be the worst thing I’ve ever had in my mouth. The look and texture of it is similar to straw, but it does not have the satisfaction that straw offers. The dark chocolate sampler I tried barely qualified to be chocolate flavored. Yes, the initial taste was slightly chocolatey, but after a second or two it morphed into something that tasted metallic and unrecognizable. It was not, I might add, a taste he wanted to cultivate. Immediately after eating I experienced a headache around my temples and a slight stomach ache.

Nutritionally speaking, an entire pint has only 100 calories, zero grams/calories of fat or sugar, and is dairy-free. The prospect of having a sugar free dessert for only 100 calories is what appealed to me. You should know better than to expect something out of nothing. Many of Wink’s marketing images include fruit, nut, and coconut chips, and these add-ons are definitely necessary to make this product palatable. It sure is easier, cheaper, and tastier to make your own sugar-free sorbet at home. Then you can also control the ingredients.

And lastly, the cost of Wink Frozen Dessert is impressive. Each pint costs $8, and Wink requires you to buy 4 pints, which cost $32. Shipping is another $9.99. Even with the free 1 pint discount for being a new buyer, the total cost was $33.99, which I consider to be money down the toilet.

Bottom line: When you see the pretty ad for Wink Frozen dessert on your Facebook or Instagram, just scroll.